Razer TRON Gaming Mouse - $25.99

Na na na na, NA na na naaaaaa…SCIENCE COPS!

Tonight, SCIENCE COPS use TECHNOLOGY to SOLVE the CASE!

OPENING CREDITS: a flashy MONTAGE of CITY STREETS, flyovers of SKYSCRAPERS, and gratuitous scenes of SCANTILY CLAD WOMEN. A focus-grouped ‘70S ROCK ANTHEM blares. We see CLOSE-UPS of each star in descending order of fame with their names underneath. CUT TO BLACK and overlay PRODUCER CREDITS.

INTERIOR: SCIENCE COPS CRIME LAB. Pan across various SCIENCE EQUIPMENT and COMPUTERS, stopping on a JAW-DROPPINGLY BEAUTIFUL FORENSIC SCIENTIST. Rack focus until she goes all BLURRY in the background and we see a piece of EVIDENCE on a TABLE, because that will look pretty SWEET.

GRUFF BUT STILL CONVENTIONALLY HANDSOME DETECTIVE enters, followed by HEADSTRONG LADY COP and LOVEABLY AWKWARD LAB ASSISTANT.

GRUFF BUT STILL CONVENTIONALLY HANDSOME DETECTIVE
Any word on our victim?

JAW-DROPPINGLY BEAUTIFUL FORENSIC SCIENTIST
Male, late 30s, Latino, heavily tattooed indicating gang affiliation, and his name was Rogelio Juarez.

LOVEABLY AWKWARD LAB ASSISTANT looks at the EVIDENCE on the TABLE.
Woah, you got all that from this tiny patch of his shirt?

JAW-DROPPINGLY BEAUTIFUL FORENSIC SCIENTIST
No, I got it from his wallet. Found it in his pocket.

GRUFF BUT STILL CONVENTIONALLY HANDSOME DETECTIVE scowls as LOVEABLY AWKWARD LAB ASSISTANT looks confused.

HEADSTRONG LADY COP
Rogelio Juarez? As in-

GRUFF BUT STILL CONVENTIONALLY HANDSOME DETECTIVE
The Juarez Cartel. Get the Captain on the phone. Tell him to get ready for a blood bath.

LOVEABLY AWKWARD LAB ASSISTANT runs out the door, as if a person in his position on the social hierarchy could just ring up a police captain and say something like, “A detective told me to tell you there’s gonna be a blood bath because of a dead Latino man.”

JAW-DROPPINGLY BEAUTIFUL FORENSIC SCIENTIST
Well if you like that, you’re gonna love this.

GRUFF BUT STILL CONVENTIONALLY HANDSOME DETECTIVE
What is it?

JAW-DROPPINGLY BEAUTIFUL FORENSIC SCIENTIST uses her Razer TRON Gaming Mouse to click a couple of buttons and suddenly an IMPOSSIBLY COMPLEX CGI MOVIE displays on a HOLOGRAPHIC MONITOR that COULDN’T EXIST in the most scientifically advanced computer labs on the planet, let alone an under-funded city police department’s crime lab.

JAW-DROPPINGLY BEAUTIFUL FORENSIC SCIENTIST
I spectronomically analyzed the data set from the strip of clothing. By examining the polymer ions of the fabric we can-

GRUFF BUT STILL CONVENTIONALLY HANDSOME DETECTIVE
Wait. Go back.

The BULLS&%T CGI ANIMATION stops.

JAW-DROPPINGLY BEAUTIFUL FORENSIC SCIENTIST
What is it?

GRUFF BUT STILL CONVENTIONALLY HANDSOME DETECTIVE
There. Enhance that image.

JAW-DROPPINGLY BEAUTIFUL FORENSIC SCIENTIST, despite no indication of what or where the detective is looking, taps on a keyboard for a few seconds and the IMAGE zooms in.

EVERYONE in the room gasps and looks stunned at WHATEVER IT IS THEY’RE LOOKING AT.

HEADSTRONG LADY COP
This case just got a whole lot more complicated.

Rack focus to GRUFF BUT STILL CONVENTIONALLY HANDSOME DETECTIVE’S FACE.

GRUFF BUT STILL CONVENTIONALLY HANDSOME DETECTIVE
You ain’t kiddin’.

CUT TO BLACK: FADE OVER “To be continued…”

CUE END CREDITS

Warranty: 1 Year Razer

Condition: New

Features:

• See and hear the TRON Gaming Mouse rev to life with unique light and sound effects straight from the movie. Let the mouse react to your actions on the Game Grid with authentic light alerts
• The 5600dpi Razer Precision 3.5G laser sensor is the most advanced Razer sensor that arms you with all the precision and tracking you need to survive in the TRON universe
• Designed to be equally comfortable for both right and left-handed use, this gaming mouse is your perfectly balanced Lightcycle hurtling you through the Game Grid

Additional Photos:

• Front Profile
• Package Contents
• Packaging

Specifications:

• Light and Sound Effects at Startup and Shutdown
• Lighting Alerts
• Ambidextrous Design
• 5600dpi Razer Precision 3.5g Laser Sensor
• 7 Hyperesponse Buttons
• 1000Hz Ultrapolling / 1ms response time
• Zero-acoustic Ultraslick mouse feet
• Braided 7 Foot USB Cable
• Approximate size: 4.3"(L) x 2.4(W) x 1.3"(H)

In the box:

• Razer RZ01-00520100-R3U1 TRON Gaming Mouse
• (2) Razer Decal Stickers